Reflections on 2013

I can’t believe today is the last day of the year!

This has been a packed year. I saw on tumblr people were posting reflections on the past year. I decided to join in and post it on my blog.

1. What did you do in 2013 that you’d never done before?
   I went to New York, that was amazing although a very short trip. I was the assistant editor for Imaginary Gardens at Pellissippi and I planned an event as well.
   

   On the Empire State Building

   

   Right before Imaginary Gardens Gala

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
   I honestly don’t remember my New Year’s Resolution for 2013.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
   Nope
4. Did anyone close to you die?
   Nope
5. What countries did you visit?
   I sadly did not visit any countries this year. Although I will be going to Japan in 2014! I will keep you posted on that!
6. What would you like to have in 2014 that you lacked in 2013?
   I would like to be less anxious and to keep my depression away. Oh I would also like to have money. Lots of money.
7. What dates from 2013 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
   -Feb. 14, 2013 Valentine’s Day.It was one of the best dates my boyfriend and I had in a long time. Between money problems, me being stressed about college.
   
   -March 10, 2013 the day I got my acceptance Letter to UT the week before I went to New York!
   -For my birthday a couple of friends surprised me and took me to The Library. A Very nice bar.
   
   -May 10, 2013 I graduated from Pellissippi. Granted the ceremony itself was underwhelming, but seeing my family and friends there, that was my favorite part.
   -Going to Walt Disney World with my family and boyfriend a week after I graduated.
   What a wonderful time.
   -Sept. 1, 2013 – Boomsday!  I had a great time hanging out with old and new friends!
   
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
   Graduating from Pellissippi State
   
   
9. What was your biggest failure?
   I really can’t recall my biggest failure. I guess that is a good thing.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
    I still deal with tendinitis in both of my knees after 3 years. Yah.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
    SIMS 3!
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
    Pope Francis vow of poverty. I wish all priests, bishops, etc. would take this vow. 
13. Whose behavior made you appalled?
    

    I am appalled by both of them. Both of their actions and for Blurred Lines.

14. Where did most of your money go?
    College and makeup.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
    Graduating from Pellissippi, Walt Disney World & Islands of Adventure, and Going to UT.
16. What song will always remind you of 2013?
    I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL!!!!!
17. Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? (c) richer or poorer?
    I am a happier and definitely poorer.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
    I wish I had written more and relaxed.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
    Procrastinate.
20. How did you spend Christmas?
    Read all about it here!
21. Did you fall in love in 2013?
    I have fallen in love with my boyfriend every day ever since I have met him back in August 2009.
22. What was your favorite TV program?
    Sleepy Hollow & Doctor Who
    
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
    No, I don’t hate anyone. Hate is such a strong emotion and takes too much energy.
24. What was the best book you read?
    World War Z
25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
    “Let It Go” from Disney’s Frozen
26. What did you want and get?
    Basically my all my Christmas gifts.
27. What did you want and didn’t get?
    A car. Maybe someday.
28. What was your favorite film of this year?
    Frozen
    
29. What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
    Having true friends.
30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2013?
    Comfortable and exploring my style.
31. What kept you sane?
    Friends, family, my boyfriend, and prayer. And exercising occasionally.
32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
    Jennifer Lawrence and Anne Hathaway
    
33. What political issue stirred you the most?
    Obamacare, the Government shutdown, and the gang rape case that occurred in India.
34. Who did you miss?
    An old friend, Jessica. We don’t talk as much as we used to. Our friendship has changed.
35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2013
    It is okay to quit sometimes, it doesn’t mean I have failed and I should make a habit of it.
36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
    I try twice as hard and I’m half as liked
    ~Some Nights by Fun

New Years Resolutions

Every year people around the world begin coming up with New Year resolutions. We all know them, I will exercise more, be more organized, try to eat healthy, stick to a budget, etc.

I will try to exercise more, I will try to be more organized, and I want to be able to do a better job at sticking to a budget. But my New Years Resolution is going to be a little different.

My New Year’s resolution is that I want to work on being less critical of myself. For those that may not know I suffer from depression and anxiety.  As a result I am usually hyper critical of myself.

I am not talking about being normal critical like of you should have done that or I should be doing homework. No, I am talking about a constant barrage of critics telling me I am not good enough, I suck at homework, I need to be perfect, why can’t I be perfect, I can’t make a mistake, why do I procrastinate so much, I shouldn’t let my depression be an excuse, what’s wrong with you, why can’t you do anything right, why can’t you chill out, why can’t you be normal. What is wrong with you.

I live with this on a daily basis, I have lived with this on a daily basis since I was 12 years old. I have been dealing with this for over 10 years.

As a result it can be difficult to function on a daily basis. Whether it comes to classes, hanging out with friends, or just writing on this blog. So this year my goal is to do my best to not be as hyper critical of myself.

I really want to learn to accept the fact that I am not perfect. That it is okay to make mistakes. It won’t be easy I have been living with this going on for over 10 years.

My goal for the end of this New Year, for 2014…. is that I want to improve and not be as self critical of myself. It won’t be easy I know that, but it would be a start. I also want to try to seek some help, some professional help just to assist me get through the process. That will not be easy also, but we shall see how it goes.

So that is my New Years Resolution, what are your resolution(s) for 2014? I would love to hear them.