Category Archives: The Mind

My Thoughts To Roosh V’s “36 Things Wrong with American Women”


So I decided to watch this, because it’s important to research the person you want to criticize instead of just blindly following the crowd. Be warned, I will use curses in this post. Also if you are a thinking human being, you will probably need a drink to get through this list.

I am really not kidding, I wish I wasn’t on all the meds I was on, otherwise I would have had a couple of drinks myself. I had to take breaks, it is just amazing to me that people like this still exist. There is so much stupid in on video, your brain will be dumbfounded.

For those that don’t know who Roosh V. is, I will introduce you to him before we start with the list. He is first generation American (Armenian and Iranian). To quote this guy on youtube

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Here is the video:

Here is the Video description

I made this video so American women can understand all the things they do wrong. I hope that they will embark on a journey of self-improvement after watching it.

I even wrote down the list for those who don’t want to watch it, are hard of hearing or deaf because the captions for it suck.  I will respond to each statement after I finished this list. My thoughts in this are italicized. The lines show where Roosh’s statements begin, I skipped the intro (nothing stood out in the intro), but kept the ending in for reasons you will see.


Roosh’s “36 Things Wrong with American Women” 

  1. They’re fat. Fat girls are simply unattractive. So, why should you waste time dating a fat girl?
  2. They’re constantly glued to their smartphone. These girls are addicted to an electronic device and are less capable of human interaction.
  3. They cut their hair short. They are so lazy to maintain long hair they make themselves ugly on purpose.
  4. They’re more impressed with the crappy DJ or instagram celebrity than a doctor who saves lives.
  5. They think being overly sarcastic is a quality that men love. Wrong, being sarcastic is rude and doesn’t show that you have a good sense of humor.
  6. They listen to stupid websites when it comes to learning how to please men.
  7. They don’t know how to cook. They’re idea of cooking is using a microwave or preparing macaroni and cheese and some women don’t even know how to do that.
  8. They wear flips flops when they are not at the beach, not at the pool or not in their house.  Flip flops are the laziest footwear you can put on and it screams to the world you simply don’t care.
  9. They have condoms in their dresser because they are fully prepared to sleep with random men. A man only wants a girl to be a slut for himself, not the entire town.
  10. They idolize drug addicted celebrities aiming to mimic their dead brain behavior. The role model for todays girl is Kim Kardashian, not a woman who actually achieved things in life.
  11. They acquire pets instead of putting in the work to land a quality man. When a woman gives up in life she buys a dog, this is sad.
  12. They don’t know how to be sexy and feminine, only trashy and slutty. Modern American women have no idea how to be a lady on the streets.
  13. They have standards way beyond their level of attractiveness. Even an average girl thinks she should land a prince charming.
  14. They think that to have a good job means they are a quality girl and a good catch. Newsflash, guys don’t care about your stupid office job nonprofit gig.
  15. They wear pajamas in public, this is retarded.
  16. They enjoy books like Twilight, 50 Shades of Grey, and The Secret. They are addicted to dead brain entertainment that makes them dumber.
  17. Their idea of travel is going to the beach or France. They have no idea how to use travel to learn about other cultures.
  18. They have too many trashy tattoos. Too many American women these days look like prison convicts.
  19. They are proud to be dating many men at the same time as if they were men themselves. These days women have no shame in hiding the fact they are sluts.
  20. They do and say filthy things in bed, even the first time you have sex with them as if they were an amateur porn actress. You know they are doing that to every other guy as well.
  21. They cockblock their own girlfriends when they are jealous. They can’t have it so their friend meets someone while they don’t.
  22. They make lame excuses for not putting effort into their appearance. It seems like a race to the bottom for every girl to be as homely as possible.
  23. #24 -(wait wheres #23) They always lie the first time you get them in bed saying “I’ve never done this before,” we know that’s a lie, but they continue saying it for every guy they sleep with.
  24. #25- (yeah, I think he skipped a number, misspoke, or can’t count) They confused being a challenge with being whiny and annoying. They have no idea how stupid they look when they give men are hard time for spending time with them.
  25. #26-They watch way too much TV, letting it influence their personalities. When you go on a date with an American girl, you are dating a combination of characters she has seen on television
  26. #27-On the way home from their comfortable office job they take off their work shoes and put on dirty sneakers. They have no idea how much of a slob they look when they do this.
  27. #28- They age their skin prematurely through fake tans. Maybe they will look good this week or next month, but in a few years time they are going to look like a raisin.
  28. #29-They insist on eating pizza, gyro, and other fattening food after a night of binge drinking and then they wonder why they are so fat.
  29. #30-They’re obsessed with cupcakes. An American woman gets satisfaction from eating tiny baked goods.
  30. #31-They care more about maintaining a career than a good home or family. She has made money the most important part of her life more than having kids or a good husband.
  31. #32-They rarely wear high heels, one of the most feminine behaviors that a woman can do.
  32. #33-They think dining out and eating food slathered with butter and salt makes them cultured and they call themselves a foodie while they do it. It just makes them fat instead.
  33. #34- They don’t speak any foreign languages. They think America is the center of the universe.
  34. #35-Their intellectual curiosity doesn’t go beyond the pages of gawker or buzzfeed. To get them to actually learn about the truths of the world is impossible.
  35. And Lastly #36-They drone on and on about the stupidest personal drama and nonsense. Thinking the day to day things they come across are critically important to anyone else

So there you have it, 36 (it’s 35) that are wrong with American women. While no woman of the world is perfect, I find that American women have the most flaws out of all the other foreign women I’ve dated. If you are stuck dating American girls right now, it would be worth your time and energy to see what foreign women have to offer you.


I actually feel physically ill just typing this list up; listening to it over and over again to make sure I got his exact words. My reaction upon listening to this individual and typing up this entire list.


By the way. congratulations. You made it through this asinine list created by a manchild that is upset that women want to be their own person and have a desire for independence.

thumbs up

That list was painful to type up, for those that didn’t want to watch the video or for those that are hard of hearing or deaf, you are welcome.


Headache starting thanks to this

Now onto my thoughts. I will respond to each individual remark he made with my own. His words will be in italics, my response won’t be.

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The Hell That is Lyme Disease

It has been quite a while since I have posted on this blog and not because I haven’t had the desire to. Back in February, I began to notice I was beginning to struggle with reading and writing. Before this, I was already experiencing constant exhaustion, to the point that if I wasn’t doing homework, I was usually sleeping. It started out in Spring 2014, when I started taking more naps than usual, but I attributed that to the stress of college life and being an older-than-traditional college student. I had a memory loss issue where I couldn’t remember who I was or where I was; that was fun. At my job I was having trouble focusing on the work, despite it being extremely simplistic (just putting labels on books); I kept switching up book labels and many times I forgot if I labeled the book at all. I tried to get better.

In the fall of 2015 a lot of stuff happened. Boyfriend lost his job, another relative came to live with us (very, very stressful since she is in her 90s), plumbing issues in the house from the toilet to the kitchen, a car accident happened, grandma went to the hospital (but she seems to always be going there), I lost my job in October because I kept making mistakes by switching up the labels. There is more, but I honestly can’t remember the details. I kept working hard in school, but I was tired a lot and was constantly taking naps. I honestly thought this was because I was dealing with a lot of stress and was feeling pretty depressed.

Finally in the Spring of 2015, my boyfriend was becoming very concerned that I was sleeping a lot. My parents thought I was maybe depressed, but to be honest, even I suspected something was up once my boyfriend mentioned his concern. At this point I was just doing homework and sleeping. I had a really hard time doing anything else. Around this time, I sadly lost someone who I had considered a really good friend. I had brought up some concerns I had and that individual became very angry and lashed out at me. I was extremely hurt emotionally and between being tired all the time, having a hard time reading and writing, and just generally living, I didn’t get back in touch, but my boyfriend did for me. Once I had the energy, that individual was pissed that I didn’t get back in touch right away  and said our friendship was over because I didn’t care. That whole story is complicated, but even now I look back at that time with sadness, no regrets, just sadness. I digress though….  It was actually watching the RHOBH reunion episode with Yolanda Foster when I began to suspect that I had lyme disease. She stated that she had trouble reading and writing. I really connected to that, but not wanting to be like the billions of people that self-diagnose using the powers of the internet, I made an appointment to go see the Doctor and I had my father with me, at this point I didn’t trust my memory at all. I told my father before we went about my difficulty reading and writing, and how I was frustrated at how I’d been continually sick for the past 5-6 years. He was very helpful during the appointment.

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Why I Wouldn’t Use the Truth Serum

If truth serum or a potion existed that could help encourage people to tell the truth, I still wouldn’t use it or want someone else to use it either.

If you can’t tell me the truth yourself, that is something you need to work on. If you need an outside substance to encourage you to tell me or anyone the truth, that is a problem.

I do understand how hard it is to be honest. On my blog I have shared with you a lot of difficult and emotionally filled truths involving my life. Ranging from depression to what is currently going on in my life. It isn’t easy, but I have always tried my best to be honest to my readers.

I know why we feel the compulsion to lie to each other. We are afraid of being taken advantage of, we are afraid of hurting someone, we are afraid of someone hurting us, we are afraid of the consequences, we are afraid of being judged; we are just generally afraid.

Telling the truth about our thoughts, emotions, etc. today is so easy (somewhat) to do, with instant consequences. We can post our own feelings and ideas on the internet, anonymously if we want to, and people will automatically respond. Now sometimes it will be a kind response, other times it could be hate filled. It all depends on the topic being discussed, if hot button topics like religion or politics there is a higher chance that the comment will be nasty or filled with hate. People should be able to disagree and be honest without wanting to kill each other or resort to being nasty (that is a topic for another day though).

but wait

I can imagine you pulling this face, hold on, I’m not finished.

I have an idea of what you are thinking. “They are just being honest about how they feel, both the original poster and the person responding to said post.” You are right, but you can still be courteous while being honest.

Here is an example with a topic that isn’t as potentially explosive as politics or religion.

Let us say a girl is trying on a dress. The dress enhances all her flaws and doesn’t look good on her. In fact it doesn’t maker her look pretty at all. Which response would you give?

A.) You look ugly in that dress.


B.) That dress does not flatter you.

B would be (haha sorry) the better answer a majority of the time unless that individual has strong self esteem and you have such an amazing friendship that if you said this to her she wouldn’t flip you off, but say “yeah good point.”

Since sometimes trying to figure out a way with being honest with them without hurting their feelings is difficult or impossible, sometimes we have to be honest.  Unfortunately being honest comes with just as many complications as lying does. When it comes to some people they can’t handle the truth.

The stronger person is an honest one though. The more you tell the truth and face the truth, the better you will be character wise. I wouldn’t want to use Truth Serum on friends, family, or even strangers. It is not my job or this serum’s job for them to tell the truth, it is their job.

Inspired by The Daily Post

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Sexual Assaults at UT

At the University of Tennessee within a month there were 5 sexual assaults reported all by young women. Knowing the statistics though, the number of sexual assaults that have occurred on a college campus no doubt double that number.

This year the UT Police Department are obligated to send an email out to all the students, faculty, and staff every time a sexual assault is reported to them. The students identity have been kept a secret and none of the young women have chosen to file charges. Out of the 5 that occurred, only 1 of them was by a stranger and that was when that person was going out for a run.

There are three things about this whole situation that have bothered me.

3.) Students reactions to the reports

On anonymous social media apps like Yik Yak, students revealed their true thoughts on the issue. Many blamed the victim. Others made a joke out of it or thought they were simply lying (hence why they aren’t pressing charges).

reminder about rape  lying about rape

Whether it is groping, rape, or another other form of sexual assault, it isn’t funny. Stop joking about it. You are not only making light of the matter, you are empowering and encouraging those committing these horrid actions and you are being disrespectful and hurtful toward the victims.

people saying shit trying to be funny

Thankfully there were a few that said this shit needed to stop.

what is wrong with you be responsible

2.) Not one of them have want to file charges against the individual.

I understand why, one of them probably thought that finding the individual would have been unlikely.



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As for the other young women that knew their assailant, I’m not surprised they didn’t file charges. You don’t feel people would believe you no matter what you do, people will look down on you because of what happened, and people will say that you shouldn’t have put yourself in that situation and question why did you trust him.

They wouldn’t say or lay any of the blame on the one who hurt you, they would just focus all that blame on you instead.

So before anyone out there lays all the blame on the victim check yourself and stop judging.

1.) It’s happening.

The fact that its happeing. The fact that there are students on campus going through this, is terrible. No one should have to go through this.

While I am glad that more awareness is being brought to this problem, it is sad that it still exists. It is sad that young women are afraid to file charges and its sad that sexual assailants get away unscared.


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Please, Stop the Music


While waiting in the waiting room for my appointment with my therapist, there were these two young women across from me.

After 5 minutes of talking about their messed up love life, where the guy was being disrespectful and not dealing with his issues. They started playing music really loud on their phones. No headphones, no consideration for those around them; just loud music.

I saw so many people sitting near them soon leave. Others were looking at them from across the room and shaking their heads. I didn’t leave myself because I put my headphones in to listen to my music.

If you find no problem with playing music loud in public without headphones: whether it is a coffee shop, a bookstore, etc. You are rude and inconsiderate.

Just because you want to listen to music doesn’t mean I want to or anyone else in the office wants to listen to music. Not everyone wants to listen to whatever genre of music you are listening to.

What makes this situation even more disrespectful is that this is a mental health clinic; therapy and rehabilitation focus. There are people coming in here dealing with issues ranging from anxiety to substance abuse withdrawal. As a result people could possibly be on the edge, people could have panic attacks, suffer from ultra sensitivity due to autism, etc. The list goes on. There were also children (ages 4-6 years old) around and some of the songs had graphic language in it. There was a teenage girl who was rubbing her temples as though she was dealing with a major headache/migraine, no doubt that loud music was not helping.

So for these two women no older than 40 to play music in a mental health clinic with young children was not only inconsiderate but irresponsible.

The biggest disappointment was that there were multiple receptionist that were working and they did nothing.

Could I have done and said something? Probably. I was actually thinking of talking to the receptionist and mention that I noticed others were uncomfortable with the loud music that they were playing. Right as I thought that though, they left.

Thank God they did.

So please if you are going to be playing music, put your headphones in. If you don’t have headphones, than don’t play music. Play a game on your phone instead, but keep the music from the game off.


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Why I Fear Failure

I can tell you that with realizing I am afraid of failure I have had to analyze why I am afraid of failure.

success is continuous

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It is all the consequences I fear as a result of failure. Although I know this and I am starting to understand it

  1. I don’t want others to look at me and think of me as incompetent.  Whether it is in work, classes, or just living in general I am terrified of looking incompetent.
  2.  I don’t like feeling incompetent either. I remember the rimes I felt incompetent and it wasn’t fun. I don’t like feeling incompetent and that happens every time I don’t accomplish my goals.
  3. I don’t want to let others down. I don’t want to let my family or friends down. I have a brother to take care of (he has autism), parents with health issues,etc. I can’t mess up. That has always been my mentality. I am the eldest daughter, I am the most capable, and I have the ability to take care of my family in the future. When it comes to my friends I don’t want them to think I am stupid or incapable. I don’t want them to think less of me. I remember times when I have told my parents I haven’t done well in class and saw the look of disappointment on their faces and could feel the disappointment radiating off of them, I felt terrible.
  4. I don’t want to mess up my chances of accomplishing my dreams. I have lots of dreams. I want to be a published author, I want to have my own business one day, I want to work in libraries. I want to learn how make clothes, jewelry, cook,etc. I want to do a lot and accomplish a lot. The more times I mess up and fail, the less the opportunities there are for me, and the more time it takes for me to accomplish my dreams and goals.
  5. I feel like a terrible person if I haven’t accomplished my goals. Whether I have failed a class or missed out on a great opportunity I feel a great weight on me as a result. I feel really stupid for not doing my best.
  6. It makes me wonder how smart I am. How capable I am. I already have some issues with my self-esteem. Everytime I don’t succeed I feel like it is a personal failure. Yes, I know that it is illogical, but trying telling my emotional self that. The emotional side doesn’t always listen.
  7. If I do something it has to be perfect. I can be something of a perfectionist. I am a perfectionist. I guess I get it from my grand mom. It doesn’t help that my mother (whom I love) is amazing and tends to do things exceptionally. It’s not that I felt pressured by her to be exactly like her, I guess I put that pressure on myself.
  8. I have high expectations for myself. I guess this goes hand in hand with being a perfectionist. I believe that I can always be doing better, that I can be a better person. Unfortunalty I am usually not satisfied with my successes or accomplishments. I don’t take the time to congratulate myself.
  9. Obsessive comparison disorder. Look up here to get an idea as to what it is. As a result of Facebook, twitter, instagram, and society we have this view and timeline as to when we need to accomplish our dreams. Graduate college at 21. After go to grad school or get a great career soon. Than meet someone get married, have kids, get a promotion in you current field, etc. Before you do all that you should travel, live on your own,etc. There are so many expectations as to what one should do with their life and so often I compare my life to others.

How do I overcome this fear?

Well it will take time. Lots of time. At least I know now why I have this issue.

Do you have a fear of failure? Why do you fear failure? Let me know in the comments below!


Where Are you Motivation?


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With being on medication for depression and anxiety, I have learned something about myself.

I don’t know how to motivate myself.

How did I motivate myself in the past pre-medication? Well a lot of self-deprecation which included a part of myself telling me that I am a failure constantly and that I wasn’t good enough.  Again I have lived with this self deprecating voice (my own voice) in my head for 12 years, as long as I had depression and anxiety.

Since I have been on medication though the self deprecating voice isn’t really there. Since I have been on medication I haven’t been able to motivate myself.

I have looked up information on the internet, I have asked for advice, and I can read everything out there. However, I don’t know how to motivate myself.

What do I need motivation for? College. I need motivation for college.  Why have I lost motivation? I will post about that soon.

What is your motivation for getting through college?



A Confession: I Live with Depression & Anxiety


I don’t think this picture describes depression accurately.

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If you haven’t caught on by now from reading this post, this post, this post, this post, and this post.  This shouldn’t really come as a shock to anyone on this post.

I live with Chronic Depression and Anxiety. I have lived with with for over 12 years, without medication.



I want you to try to understand living with depression and anxiety for 12 years straight. Only occasionally going to therapy. Before now I have had only 2 Doctors, one was Dr. Smartt and I liked her, but I stopped seeing her after a year. The other I only saw was for a month and I didn’t like her. She thought I hated women…

da fuq


As a result. I stopped going for about a year. In between my first Doctor and the last (failed) Doctor I saw therapists at school. Those free therapists that are trying to gain experience…yeah.  Many times I would either just talk to them and didn’t receive any help. If I was to be honest, that was all the time. After half a year or a full year they would leave. With that I would have to start my whole story all over again.

As you can imagine that got old fast, I became discouraged, and I began to think therapy was a waste of time.

This past December I finally decided that I should go to see a professional and try to go on medication. Something I have been extremely hesitant to do.

I can tell you right now that I do not regret this decision at all. It has been a great help to me.

I want you to imagine anxiety and depression on a scale of 0-10. With 0 being nonexistent and 10 being unlivable. Before medication my constant anxiety was typically at a 12/13. My Depression would be at a 16.

I honestly don’t know how I functioned for the past 12 years. I really don’t know.

I can tell you that now my anxiety is at a 8 currently, for all of you that may be high, for me that is an improvement. My Depression is at a 5, now that is awesome.

Being on medication hasn’t been a cure, it won’t cure your depression and anxiety. I still go to therapy. It helps me somewhat recognize what it is like to not have anxiety and depression.

I still live with anxiety and depression, but I can tell you now it is a little more manageable. For one thing I actually have somewhat of an idea of how a person without chronic depression and anxiety lives. Which is nice to say the least.

Do you live with anxiety? Depression? What are your thoughts on this post? Let me know in the comments below!



My Writing Projects for This Summer 2014

The Writing Cycle by Katherine Firth

The Writing Cycle
by Katherine Firth

Man, finals wiped me out. I actually had to go to the ER because it got that bad. I can tell you though I am happy and I am glad to be back to blogging.

I am very glad I get to be on a little break. Although I will be taking a course of two this summer, I have about 2 months off to recuperate in the meantime.

Upon realizing and coming to terms with the fact that I have a huge fear of failure (t also doesn’t help that I am a bit of a perfectionist, that is a story for another day). I have also realized something else, it has prevented me from doing the one thing I have always wanted to do- write and publish a novel.

No longer can I sit around, worry about what happens if I do write this story. No longer can I just sit on my butt and become anxious because the story I am writing didn’t come out perfect the first 3 times I wrote it. I must write it, I have to try. No longer can I be afraid.

I have to Let It Go!

I couldn’t resist 🙂

As a result of all of these realizations, I have decided on my 3 writing projects for this summer:

#3.) My Blog

This in itself is more of an ongoing, neverending project of mine. I love blogging and I won’t be stopping anytime soon. It has really helped me grow as a writer and also has helped me really face many of these issues I have already discussed. Also, I love the people I have talked with, reading other peoples experiences, and it has been a lot of fun.

#2.) My Harry Potter Fanfiction Story

I have had this idea since the 5th book came out. I was disappointed with how the series ended (ducks as potterhead throws shoe at me), it felt like there was something missing and there were lots of things unresolved. What started as fixing one book, eventually turned into an idea to rewrite the whole series. It won’t be just from Harry POV either. Id doubt I will finish all 7 stories in one summer, but I hope to finish the first one at least.


#1.) Finish the First Draft of The First Book of A Series

I actually began this writing idea around NaNoWriMo last year and I never finished it. Life got in the way. Other people who partcipated in NaNoWriMo that I was friends with, really loved the idea and one of them couldn’t wait to read it. It will probably be Young Adult and no I won’t tell you about the plot. I hope to finish the first draft of the first book by the end of summer (I know the expectations seem high, but we shall see).

I am very excited about this and I am very excited to start!

Are you working on any writing projects? Are you thinking of starting one? Let me know in the comments below!


Mental Health Awareness Month

mental health

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May is mental health awareness month.

I really feel that mental health isn’t taken as seriously as physical health. If I were to be honest, it still feels that someone can be stigmatized if they had health issues.

From my experience it seems to be worse if it is related to your mental health.

If we injure our leg due to sports, we can talk about going to our physical therapist without a problem.  Yet whether life injures me or my body has chemical issues causing me to be depressed or anxious if I talk about seeing my therapist people begin to feel uncomfortable or they avoid me like I have the plague.


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Why is that?

Mental Health does not just affect an individual mentally, it can affect their physical health as well. It can cause they to be tired, hurting, nauseous, etc.

Why does it still seem taboo to talk about it?

People are still afraid to talk about their mental health. They are afraid of being judge, being looked at differently, or just being seen as weak.

I am not going to lie, I am scared to talk about my mental health. For me it is something I have struggled with since I was 11/12 years old. I don’t remember a day when I felt normal. I can’t tell you the many times that I have been called crazy just because I have depression and anxiety.

Why should I be judged for living mental health issues?

I plan on posting more about my battles with mental health this month. I am really afraid, but I am tired of having this topic be so stigmatized and people being so judgy about it.

Do you struggle with your mental health? What is your biggest struggle? Let me know in the comments below!